24 October 2012

How NOT to be the Perfect Mom

A few weeks ago, I started looking comparing each area of my life to other mommies. And guess, what I found? I found that I was failing at everything! My house was a mess. My 2-year-old was disobedient and still throwing wild temper tantrums in public. I wasn't cooking every night, and  I wasn't being as loving a wife as my husband needs. I was falling down in my responsibilities as a volunteer leader in MOPS, and I wasn't blogging as regularly as I wanted to. And most importantly, I wasn't spending as much time with God as I should be.

Of course, after realizing how much of a failure I was, I started really getting down. With so many people who are desperately trying to have a baby, why did God trust me with children when I was just letting everyone down, especially myself.  I was so low, and I really didn't know how to recover. I started thinking about my "Super-mom" friends who seemed to have it all together, and I wondered why they were so capable of doing what I was incapable of doing.

Fortunately though, God reminded me of His grace by sending me the right messages through friends, speakers, articles, and Bible study. 

Here's the thing I realized: my friends aren't perfect either. No one is perfect!  And it is especially difficult to be perfect when you are adjusting to the constant changes of growing children.

So if none of us is perfect, why do we all pretend to be? Why do I feel like my house needs to be polished before someone comes over? Or why do I try to put my children in their cutest (or just matching) clothes before we get together with other mommies? Why do I feel like I have to make Naomi's baby food, and cook a full meal from scratch every day, all while still making time for a full house cleaning every day? 

AND WHO started this competition to be the most competent "Super-mom" around ANYWAY?!? 

If one mommy pretends to be perfect, her friends feel like they have to be perfect, and what we end up with is a bunch of imperfect mommy's pretending to have it all together and never completely opening up to each other. Some of us are drowning in our own chaos and afraid to let anyone know because we don't want to drop the facade of "Super-mom". That would mean admitting we aren't perfect...

Well here it is: I. AM. NOT. PERFECT!!! And I am going to stop pretending to be Super-mom.

So what if my toddler isn't potty-trained yet! She knows she is loved unconditionally, and she will get there. So what if my baby isn't getting her tummy time every day! She is adored and she is reaching her milestones despite my imperfect schedule. And So what if my home looks like a dirty toy box. It is filled with love.

Maybe this will help me open up more to my friends, and maybe it will turn some people off. And maybe, just maybe, it will help another mommy feel like she can let go of the "Super-mom" facade as well. But I know that it will give God an opportunity to show His strength through my weakness. 2 Corinthians 12:9 is such a beautiful reminder.

As it turns out, God's grace is big enough to cover my failures.

1 comment:

  1. I know how you feel Hannah!! My house is ALWAYS a mess! I'm always behind on laundry, dishes, vacuuming etc. I get embarrassed when company arrives but then I look at my kids and know that they are so much more important than having a house out of better homes and gardens lol. My kids are healthy, happy and making great memories and that's what counts!! I gave up trying to be supermom after having babies 14 months apart :)

    Tracy F.