16 June 2011


Before I met my husband, I was told that I would never be able to get pregnant, and that if I managed to get pregnant, I would never carry a child to survival. In fact, the doctor actually insinuated that I would be negligent to try to get pregnant. The official diagnosis was Poly-cystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS) and a uterine deformity called Bicornuate Uterus. The PCOS would prevent pregnancy, and the uterine deformity was very bad and would prevent me from carrying a child.

I believed what the very educated doctor told me, and it rocked me to my very core. I had been so looking forward to being a mommy.

A few months later, while I was trying to spend some alone time with God without another man in my life, I met a guy who irritated me from the start. I mean, he really really annoyed me. I was trying to lead a single women's Bible study, and he crashed it, with his motorcycle and his shoulder length blonde hair. All of the women in the group wanted him, flirted with him, and even came to me asking if it would affect the group if they dated him. Five months after I met him, I married him.

I told my husband the doctor's verdict, and he smiled and said that God wouldn't put two people together with such a burning desire to have lots of kids and not bless them with any. I have been standing on his faith ever since, while I pray for mine to grow.

We didn't OFFICIALLY "try" for the first two years of marriage, but we didn't prevent either. I was, of course, trying to make sure we were giving God every opportunity by seducing at the appropriate time during my cycle, taking vitamins and natural fertility remedies. I was also on Metformin for PCOS the whole time. So by the time hubby was ready to "try", I was already discouraged.

My new doctor was fine with us trying and was willing to give me Clomid to help with the process. We didn't feel peace about trying fertility meds at that time, and in that case. Don't get me wrong, I wanted to take the Clomid! But hubby wasn't there, and when one of us is not at peace, WE are not at peace. I believe that infertility is an issue that God sometimes heals through medical intervention, but not for us ....yet.

We prayed for a miracle, and my heart broke every cycle for the next year. Our marriage began to take a major dive ...like into the toilet. I was disenchanted, frustrated, and ready to be done with it. It wasn't just the infertility ...I mean, that didn't help, but it didn't cause our marriage problems either. I even packed up and tried to leave at one point, but thank God, our good friends stepped in and helped me realize I didn't want to give up.

I stopped taking the PCOS medicine while we were trying to get our marriage right, and suddenly, as if to miraculously heal our marriage, we conceived our first child in the fall of 2008, due in June 2009! We were full of rejoicing, and although we knew I would be high risk because of my uterus, we knew that God would protect both me and our child throughout our pregnancy.

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